


The sun is gone

by IllusionGates



Category: Kagerou Project, Mekakucity Actors
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-24
Updated: 2014-06-24
Packaged: 2018-02-06 00:30:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1837777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IllusionGates/pseuds/IllusionGates
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She was gone and it was all his fault.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The sun is gone

She was gone and it was all his fault.

Shintaro felt miserable, he felt like a fool. The sun that had shone brightly in his life has left. And it was his fault.

On that day he had told her to disappear and never come back. He never meant it literally, but he had been just so angry that day Ayano.. she, she kept trying to cling onto him like they were some couple and it ticked Shintaro off and he said the wrong thing.

Now she was gone.

Shintaro remembered the next day he went to the class room to find flowers on her desk. He was confused, especially when his classmates started crying.

 _Why are they crying? Why are they putting flowers on Ayano’s desk? You idiot’s she’s going to be here soon. What are you doing?_ Shintaro thought bitterly.

She never came.

The third day he went to class she did not come also. 

The fourth day he was told she committed suicide. Shintaro didn't believe it of course. The always-smiling Ayano committing suicide? That's a lie.

The fifth day the flowers were thrown into the trash left to wither away. And everyone was smiling again. Everyone was laughing. And it sickened Shintaro.

He felt like they forgot about Ayano like she was just, yesterdays news. It was pathetic. He was disgusted he wanted to leave, far away from all of them.

And he did.

After that he never went to school again no matter what his mother or Momo would say.

He didn't want to see them smiling laughing without a care in the world! Their classmate just died! How could they just forget?

_He never left his room._

Shintaro never wanted to move on, moving on would mean forgetting her, forgetting Ayano. He didn't want that! He wanted to remember the way she smiled, the way she pouted when she got a low test score, the way she would always make paper cranes to cheer herself up, and the way her red scarf would flutter in the wind.

Oh, that's right she had told him that his red jersey had suited him, but he didn't take it to heart and never wore it again. He felt regret.  
He remembered that he wasn't treating Ayano as a real friend and yet she stayed with him. He had pushed her away said terrible remarks to her and she would ignore him and smile. 

When was the last time he made Ayano happy?

He wasn't sure.

Shintaro laughed bitterly to himself, a guy with an IQ of one hundred and sixty eight cant even figure out one logical reason why you died Ayano.

A guy with an IQ of one hundred and sixty eight cant even comfort his dear friend when he found her crying that day.

But who could blame him? He had never made friends, he didn't know what to do, he wasn't social. He didn't know what to do when they cried, he didn't even know what to do when they’re happy. 

He should of approached Ayano that day when she cried. If he had maybe she would have been here today.

And the day he told her to disappear and never come back he regretted it. But she had smiled. _Smiled_. 

He then remembered a certain conversation he had had with Ayano before.

“Hey, Shintaro-kun.. Do you believe in heaven?” Ayano had asked

“Heaven? Of course not.” He had barked back “There is no proof it existed.”

“…that maybe so but I would like if it would exist.” Ayano replied

“…you’re an idiot Ayano.” Shintaro hissed

Shintaro laughed again and felt tears fall from his eyelids. 

“I’m sorry.. I'm so sorry.. Your not an idiot Ayano.. I'm the idiot! I'm so sorry! I'm so-

But his statement would remain unanswered because she is already gone.

It was too late.

He wondered if Ayano was in heaven, if she was watching over him, maybe cursing him to death. He laughed, that would be a little too much for Ayano. For all Shintaro knew she would be smiling at him. With.. that smile.

He knew there was sadness behind her eyes but he didn't want to address it to her. What would she say? And besides, Shintaro didn't feel like talking about personal problems. He wasn't social and he didn't want to make a fool of himself.

But he was already a fool. _A big fool._

And she was gone.

If Ayano was indeed in heaven then Shintaro wanted to be with her. He wanted to stay with her forever.

With that thought, Shintaro grabbed a pair of scissors lying waitlessly on his desk.

He didn't give a damn if Momo or his mother found him. He, he just missed Ayano so much he could die. And he would die.

He took in Ayano’s long brown hair and the two red clips attached to her left.He took in her red scarf clinging to her uniform and the laughter sounding like music to his ears.

“I'm coming to see you Ayano..” 

Shintaro smiled because he knew he deserved this for causing Ayano so much pain.. He should of talked to her, should of allowed her to hold his hand, and should of allowed them to look like a couple.

He took a breath “I'm sorry I didn't realize it sooner. You loved me didn't you? You still loved me today, too.” 

He placed the scissors next to his neck and said his last words

“I love you too, Ayano.”


End file.
